Monday, July 27, 2015

"It Is What It Is"

"It is what it is"

The content that you read on The Autistic Help blog is what it is. Everything that you read on this blog is real, authentic, to the point and as candid as I possibly can make it. I'm not strict about the SEO dynamic and the technical mumbo jumbo that goes along with the internet these days. The Autistic Help isn't a blog that I want to micromanage. The Autistic Help is a free space for autistic readers (and non-autistic readers) to express their opinions on the topics that I present if they so wish. I put emphasis on the word "free", a word that many people abuse these days.

Nowadays when people use the word "free", they only use that word to their own liking and interpretation. What they consider "free" may not always actually be "free" in reality, if you know what I mean. If they're happy with the content that is written and put out there, for example, then they'll consider that free space to be acceptable. If they're not happy with that content, then of course they will throw a hissy fit and undermine and devalue everything a writer writes. "That's not free space! No freedom for you!", they'll say.

That's the world we live in today and society in general is at fault for letting issues like this get this bad. Society in general has lost so much sense of itself that whenever rules are put up for people to follow, it becomes very easy for people to get confused, as in people don't know how to interpret rules anymore. As a writer, I would know plenty about this. As an autistic person, it hurts especially. I don't like to be confused about any sets of rules that I would need to follow. I don't want to be confused. I never purposely try to scramble my brain just by reading rules, whether they be for a job listing or what have you. Stuff just happens, and even after I ask for help to clarify the rules, people get upset at me. Hey, that's the world we live in today.

I want to get the point across through The Autistic Help blog that freedom is just that; freedom. I am free to write about anything that touches my heart and moves me in such a way to write about it. If people have a problem with what I write and how I write it, then I say that's just too bad. They can instead read glorified sensationalism content like the Huffington Post, for example. No, I don't take that last sentence back.

^ I will NEVER let anyone treat me like this.

Just because I state that I'm autistic shouldn't give people the license to undermine my work, disrespect my standing as a writer and string me along like a puppet to fulfill their wishes. I don't like to be micromanaged. I don't like to be bullied. I don't like to be told what I can and cannot do, especially if it means sacrificing my identity and my integrity. Just because my brain is wired differently compared to others doesn't give people the right to label me as uneducated or someone who just doesn't "get it". If this is how society behaves, thinks and acts, then maybe we need to start lightening up on all the technical mumbo jumbo and start getting back to basics?

Friday, July 24, 2015

Poem - Keep Trying

Keep Trying
By Steven Vitte

Description: A poem that basically sends the message to other autistic people or those with general disabilities to keep moving forward no matter what.

When all seems lost,
When all seems to be for nothing,
When everything becomes an illusion,
When everything becomes a glorified joke...
Keep trying.

When everything appears to lose its purpose,
When all the ugly truths rise to the surface,
When all you've seen starts to hurt your eyes,
When all you've felt starts to hurt your heart...
Keep fighting.

When everyone you knew before betrays you now,
When everyone you asked for help ignores you,
When all that they do pushes you aside,
When all that they say excludes you...
Keep moving forward.

When everyone makes fun of you,
When everyone voices their doubts of you,
When everyone forgets your existence,
When everyone you wanted support from is now the opposing resistance...
Keep moving toward the goal.

My dreams are to be protected to the utmost,
Not everyone can see what I see,
They don't have the vision that I have,
 Some say I shouldn't be a dreamer,
Some say that I should be of the status quo,
Perhaps not me, but it is they who don't know?
Those who say I can't are usually those who "can't" themselves...

When all you do fails,
When all that you say falls on deaf ears,
When all your hard work only results in agony and tears,
 When everyone around you desires your hurt...
Keep pushing your dreams.

When they try to destroy your character,
When they try to destroy your confidence,
When they try to break your spirit,
When they try to spit on your legacy...
 Keep living for the truth.

Keep trying to do all that you can.
Keep trying.

Friday, July 10, 2015

When Days Just Drag On

I am sure many of us have felt this way many times in our lives. I am sure that we have developed great levels of boredom at some point in time, times when there really isn't anything to do and you don't know exactly what to do. It isn't a feeling I want to often have. I want to be doing something constructive with my time. I want to be doing something that makes a difference in not only my own life but in other people's lives.

Sometimes, though, the world has a way of forcing one to be bored no matter how hard one tries to be productive in life.

There are different types of boredom, to be sure. There is the harmless type of boredom where things are smooth sailing and you are otherwise enjoying yourself during the day. You have completed pretty much everything you wanted to do in a single day and now you're just kicking back and relaxing. Yeah, boredom may set in if you consider this scenario, but this isn't the type of boredom to be worried about.

There is the harmful type of boredom where you feel stuck and you don't know what to do. The type of boredom you experience when you set out to do something interesting, and then you find out that something wasn't really that interesting to begin with. The type of boredom you experience when you are eager to accomplish something, and yet, you feel like you're being shut down at every corner you turn. It's this type of boredom that sometimes bothers me, I admit.

Especially recently, I have faced plenty of boring days where everything just seemed to drag on. I can't fully explain why I've had these kinds of days. Not all of these days were terrible, but they were definitely underwhelming and "blah", for lack of a better term. I just feel like there have been days in my life where I could have addressed something important, and yet, I never got around to doing that, and I ended up kicking myself because of this feeling.

I guess it's just that feeling of uncertainty I develop when a boring day becomes boring. Not knowing what to do, not knowing what the next move to make, and then realizing that I could have done something more interesting than what I ended up doing... Sometimes that feeling hurts.

I know there will be days ahead in the future when I will be as busy as a little ant with a hardhat on, digging through chunks of dirt with a little pickaxe. I know I will have my busy days. I know that I will have days where I feel really excited and relieved to have done something very interesting and important. Those days will come. However, since I don't have much of a support group, it gets really hard for me to deal with the boring days and the terrible days. I push myself as hard as I can, but sometimes even that's not enough to get me away from the bored feeling.

Overall, though, keep challenging yourself. Keep finding ways to motivate yourself, and if you hit a major bump in the road where you feel really bored about how the day is going, just endure. Find ways to feel comfortable and happy. Whatever you like to do, just do it. Do the things that you know you will enjoy doing, and don't let anyone else question what you're doing. It's none of their business, and it's not their decision to make anyway. You are your own person. The course of a day depends on how you want to handle that day. 

Sunday, July 5, 2015

Perception Is Not Reality

There is one saying that is tossed around by many people "Perception is reality", and many of us know exactly what this saying means. How we perceive some people to be often gives us a first impression of those whom we haven't gotten to know yet. Just by looking at someone we can immediately develop the belief that something is very wrong with that person. In the sense of people who fall under the special needs category, there will often be others who walk by and put down these special needs people.

We live in a society today where bullies and antagonists exist just around every possible corner, and they are looking to target the weakest links of society. Those weakest links would be those who are of special needs or mentally disabled. The perception that people, especially bullies, have of us autistic people is the belief that we are such easy targets that anything they say, even if it's just slightly offensive, will throw us off track and upset us. That is the developed perception of the average autistic person.

Jokes are cracked about us autistic people all the time. Search through the internet and you will see a myriad of jokes that are made just to put us down. I know this to be true. Perhaps some of you who are reading this post right now are guilty of doing this, making jokes about autistic people. Perhaps some of you are even proud of making fun of autistic people because it makes you feel superior in some way.

Regardless of who reads this blog post, I want to make this perfectly clear. No matter who gets in my way, and no matter what anyone does to try and put me down for being on the Autism Spectrum, no amount of bullying nor antagonistic behavior will stop me in accomplishing my goals in life. I can't let the arrogance and stupidity of other people get in the way of what I want to do in my life. I can't dwell on their problems. I can't influence the decisions they make. That is beyond my control. That is not my problem that I need to solve.

Countless times in the past I have experienced people approaching me, offering friendship and whatnot, but only to have me turn around and realize that these people were never really my friends to begin with. They saw me at first glace, got to know me, and supposedly studied me to find any weaknesses in me, and if they did find a weakness in me, they exploited it. This was super frequent during my days in elementary school. I would have kids in my school invite me over to play video games one day, and then the next day they were making fun of me. I have tried to make friends online in more recent times, but only to have those bridges burn down to nothing because of something they expected me to agree with, but wouldn't. Sometimes considering the way I am, being autistic, I am not surprised why these things keep happening to me.

Let's face the facts of the world that we live in today. People love first impressions. People love the initial perceptions that they develop of others, as well as the initial perceptions of themselves that they want others to see. Many people have adopted this self-absorbed mentality where they need to be right all the time, regardless of whether this mentality hurts other people's feelings. It hurts for these people to be exposed for living a lie and not embracing the truth.

Perception is NOT reality. I will repeat this thousands of more times if I have to. Just because you see me and you become aware of the fact that I am autistic, doesn't mean that you know the full story of me. Just because you know I'm autistic doesn't mean that you know everything there is to know about me. Just because you know my weaknesses for being autistic doesn't give you a special right to exploit those weaknesses and take advantage of me only because it makes you feel better about your self-absorbed agenda.

Perception is not reality, and for some of us, reality never really hits home.